Friday 21 September 2012

My passion - wherefore art thou?


Lately I have slowly but surely been falling into a strange place of the unknown.

I have no idea what I want to do with my life.

I Googled "How to Find Your Passion" simply because I have no idea what mine is is. I am a little worried because I am 29 years old now and the clock of my life is well and truly ticking.

I admire people who are living their passion and at the same time they baffle me. How did they know their path was the right one for them? What enlightens and inspires them?  Personally this seems like a very difficult question for me to answer for some reason.

As a child I always dreamt of being a singer. I began singing lessons when I was thirteen years old just before I became unwell with anorexia and my lessons were swiftly replaced by years of Doctor appointments.

Fast forward to today (and minus an undeveloped singing ability) I made a list of the things I love:

Writing - I always carry a notebook around with me
Creativity- poetry and art mostly
Psychology and helping people - I put my heart and soul into studying this field
Fashion - I can spend hours window shopping and admiring beautiful clothes online

Where am I in this list?

I don't know.
I wish I did and soon.

5 comments:

  1. I think this is such a common quandary - and you pretty much summed up exactly how I feel most of the time! It seems more and more pressing as time goes on as well...'I must decide what I want to do before I'm twenty one, thirty, forty...' And the goalposts keep moving because we never feel like we've gotten to where we should before our (self-imposed) deadlines.

    I think doubts like this are just part of being human - it's normal for us to worry about where we're going and whether we're fulfilling our potential. I think you're luckier than a lot of people in that you KNOW what you love to do - some people don't even recognise that.

    I used to think that I needed all of the things I loved to coalesce into this wonderful, life affirming career that incorporated every single element. Now I think it's enough that I incorporate those things into my daily life wherever possible.

    Live what you love. Don't feel like you have to fit into some tidy little category: writer, psychologist, etc. All ofthe things you love are elements of You, and who You are - a partiular career doesn't need to cement that for you.

    Big hugs - and it's nice to see I'm not the only one with these nagging thoughts xxx

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    1. Thank-you very much for your lovely and insightful words Cheryl. I appreciate it a great deal. I think 'live what you love' is a wonderful way to view this dilemma and that trying to fit all these things into one category such as a career is perhaps not a realistic feat. I too am glad that I am not the only who feels challenged by these matters also.

      Big hugs right back to you and thanks again xo

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  2. I really don't know if what I'm going to say will help, but I will try. I started playing the guitar and writing songs when I was 12. Music has been the only way I find to say what I feel when I cannot speak and to cope with the pain and let things go without hurting myself.
    Music is my life. Although I'm having a hard time with recovery and I am lost and hopeless, music is always there when I'm so alone. Depression is hitting so hard right now and I usually go off the things I enjoy, but everything's different with music. Music is there to show me that there is at least something that I'm good at. It makes me feel alive.
    I also love other things such as writing (in general, languages that are related to what I study at university and reading a lot, among other things. But NOTHING compares to my passion for music.

    I hope it makes sense :)

    Don't give on up your dreams!
    Never's too late to do the things you love <3 xxx

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    1. Hey you,

      You are always helpful to me as I appreciate you taking the time to write to me lovely girl. It seems that music is 'your thing' and it is a very good thing to hold onto especially when things are difficult. Whateever helps you the most never let go of this. I hope you feel better soon and please remember I am always here for you if you need me. You are going to come through it - never forget that what goes DOWN must come UP and things always change every day. You will be on your way up in no time I am sure of it. Stay strong - sending you much love xo

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  3. Thank you for your kind words. I just wish I could believe that.

    You are wonderful and beautiful, I believe in you and I know you will reach all your dreams.

    Never stop fighting <3 xoxo

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