Hello once again Blogger.
I’m back.
It was such a shock after working so hard for so long that I
found myself back at what seemed like square one of recovery. Relapse/a breakdown
of sorts was not on my itinerary – but there I was, having to find everything inch
of strength I had to fight…again. I don’t think I will ever question the sheer
power of an ED and what it can do if it somehow kicks back in again. No matter how strong and well I become, triggers
are STILL triggers and can cause havoc if you are not mindful of their danger.
BUT, drumroll please...
I am feeling much better. I have worked hard to find my
footing again and I learnt so much. Lessons perhaps I didn’t want to learn but
really needed to.
Internally I have processed a great deal and am finding my
spirit is evolving back once more.
I am feeling better again and this seems like a victory to be to be able to write those words.
I never had any doubt that you'd be back, flourishing again, in full flower. Remember: even roses need pruning so that they can grow into their most beautiful selves. You have taken the necessary time to prune what was browning your lovely colours, to clip away the softness of rot. That is not a waste, nor a setback. I think relapses can be the most valuable things, Kylie, if you learn from them the way you did. It's when we relax into them that they're trouble. If we learn from them, if we take the time to clip and cut where necessary, if we treat ourselves the way we would a wilting flower we wanted to nurse back to health - light, nourishment, pruning, care - then we find ourselves reaching for the sun again, stronger and more beautiful than before. Never have I known someone with a more appropriate name than you, Kylie-Rose, and it is so lovely to see you tending to those roots, stretching for the light, back in full, lovely bloom.
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